Toadofsky out of 2666 games 2417 were blitz and a great majority of those were 3+2. Maybe this is partly why my progress was slow? Maybe my choice of playing all blitz games was hindering my development? Should I not play as much blitz? I did find some use in recognizing certain lines but your feedback is appreciated.
My greatest learning occurred when I started playing correspondence on chess.com and other sites; and with chess teams analyzing my G/60 and slower games.
Online I'd suggest that players below 2000 should play either rapid or classical time controls if they wish to analyze their games and learn from their mistakes.
The improvement from 1000s to 1500+ is such an accomplishment and that rewarding feeling? oh man you can't recreate that. No way any engine victory will ever be able to replace the feeling of smashing another milestone.
I don't have any hate towards you, I just want to know that genuine achievement is such a feeling; and I don't want you to miss out on it :)
It speaks well of you to have admitted you cheated, and also that you are conscious of how that affects the community and particularly the opponents you played against.
I don't think using computer assistance teaches chess. If you still want "learn" that way, you could play as Anonymous, not logging in and not affecting anyone else's rating. Anonymously, you won't feel the pressure for appearing successful and thus become frustrated either, if that's what you mean. Your opponents will probably quit once you start delaying every move by 4 seconds, you will end up getting bored and, above all, neither you nor your opponent will learn or enjoy chess.
"For me, it wasn't about winning or losing. It was about learning."
Literally the next sentence:
"I was also becoming frustrated because I wasn't having any success."
Learning doesn't equate to success, so your excuse is BS. You cheated to win because you couldn't win as much as you wanted to on your own.
I forgive you @shanksamillion
people who use engine assistance in games should not get banned it is not a fair punishment a more fair punishment is putting them in a Lion enclosure ;)
Learning through pain.
One whip for every game you let the devil's engine influence you.