do you know good chess jokes?

write here your good chess jokes.

"If I were your queen i'd put poison in your tea!"

"If i were your king i'd drink it!"

When he was young, he was good, but now I consider GM Kamsky to be a joke. [It's a joke, not meant to be shameful.)

A horse sits down in a movie theater and the queen next to him asks "Excuse me...are you a horse?"

"Why yes, I am" replies the horse.

"What are you doing ah this movie?"

The horsey says: "I really liked the book!"

Where do horseys go when thery are sick?

To the horespital.

To practice chess,

Just "sit at the board and play with yourself" - GM Magnus Carlsen

Once my when I was younger, my mom was busy, so she told me to play chess with myself... I won.

The feeling when you finally checkma...

Q: What did the Aussie say when he returned bread to the baker?
A: It's stale, mate.

Q: Why do most people in the U.S. suck at chess?
A: Because their king is a pawn.