I spent a lot of time on each move

And yet, I still missed a ton of winning tactics. Please help.

11. O-O and white is better. But it's not yet winning.

Some perspective for you: a 10 minute rapid game isn't a lot of time. So you may be thinking you spent a lot of time on each move, but compared to a classical game you really aren't even scratching the surface. I commented a while back on a player that complained that he isn't improving in chess. Turns out that he wasn't spending any time on his moves. So you're well on your way to chess improvement if you keep doing this. I recommend using an increment so that chess decides the outcomes of your rapid games and not the clock. If you like 10 minutes, play 10+5. If you can play even longer, maybe try 15+5. As for missing tactics -- well that happens to all of us. You can solve some puzzles here on lichess, but I think just playing more games will help. Up to you. Good luck!

Ive been doing bullet and blitz recently i see improvement in the opening its bad to analyse bullet or blitz but i do it for my opening because people in bullet or blitz know opening theory to be able to have an advantage for themselves also games last shorter so you can be having very big opening knowledge I choose it because atm my opening is weak im ok at the endgame so any suggestions on what time control i should do for my middle game practice

15 O-O is winning. You still have 4 pieces on their starting squares and you play your queen once more. You still had 9 minutes on your clock in this 10+0 game.
16 Kd1 moves your king to an unsafe spot, where it can be harrassed. 16 Kf1 shuts in your Rh1, but is safer.

"I spent a lot of time on each move"
That's awesome, only few players do this (at lower levels)
" I still missed a ton of winning tactics"
Practice tactics and pattern recognition.
Mistakes happen but don't let them become habits. Even the strongest players made mistakes on their road to GM.
And remember "Practice makes a man perfect" :-)

All the best for future and have a great day ahead!

~DrZwischenzug

20 Rxe5 looks like it wins