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  3. Dealing with negative emotions


I mean, it is probably bad, but it is not that bad as I used to think it was. If someone play 1. a4, it is not as bad as blundering a piece, for example. The computer probably will give something like -0.3, which is equal for our mundane terms. Pawn pushers are trickier. They just start to push pawns like a space invaders game and almost never moving a piece. Only the gods know how many games I lost to those players. But if this is objectevly bad (as it must be), then it is part of my evolution as a player to prove it. If I can't prove, well, it seems I am not that good, so it always end as my problem, not theirs.

Interesting topic. As far as openings go... yes when i see some person play some nonsense I take it upon myself to try and punish them. And if I fail I actually make the effort of figuring out in the opening where I could have done better. Even if it was a blitz game. The old saying do not analyze your blitz games is just not true anymore. You can learn alot from your Blitz games too especially from an opening point of view. Rinse, Lather repeat :P
I used to also struggle alot with winning and losing but as Kestony points out I now focus more on just improving. Nowadays I get more frustrated when my opponents who do beat me do not want to play rematches... especially if it was a good game... I call them rating hunters as they do not want to play good players they just want to climb rating. So that is my current frustration lol. That and Ive been quite a bit sick lately, but that cannot last forever :)

One-time chess styles.
Tournaments give us the chance to play different playing styles, without having to play a rematch. Playing is like eating, a little bit of this and a little bit of that. Don't get frustrated because somebody wants to capture (eat) all the pieces before checkmating. It's like eating all the vegetables, before eating the meat. Obviously there is more than one way to enjoy things. Accepting how others play, will make the present more enjoyable. When we encounter a pleasing style of play, we tend to want a rematch, but it does not mean our style of play was that enjoyable for our opponent. So don't expect rematches. Just be happy when you finally find a friend that wants one.

Playing the clock rather than the position, is a style of play that some might not care to repeat.

Yeah, don't think that you have the "right" to play a rematch (especially if you lose). You really don't.

It is not injustice. You can do anything you want and you opponent can do anything they want. If we want to play, we play. If we don't want to play, we don't play.

It is that simple.

Just be who you are; the more you strive to be someone else the unhappier you become. I think that it's the main reason for all of our misery. If you only play for fun and enjoyment, you would then care less, if you'll win or lose.
Think about that we are all friends.

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