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XEhazAkQuqH_JuWzaoYZ's Blog

The purpose of this post is for me to have a place where I can post my website experiences as I use the website and express my opinions about stuff and write about what I want relating or not relating to the website. I may update this post sometimes if I want to write something instead of creating many posts.

The idea is from Sag0n's fresh blitz games post where he posts his fresh blitz games sometimes. Anyone reading this may write in this post a comment or some opinion whatever. I decided to make this post because I have some issues and opinions about the the site and it's community and I wanted a place where i can write about this in 1 place.

DISCLAIMER: If you are a moderator of the forum don't archive or close this post because i may update it sometimes. If you must close or archive this post first give a specific reason in a form of a post under that post.
POST 1

A joke

For some reason the community here is weird. People usually don't answer to messages and being hostile for no reason. I have many experiences with this, this is 1 topic i may talk about sometime. So i don't have a good experience with lichess players. Happened many times that I messaged someone and after some time they stopped to answer or didn't answer at all I guess it's ignorance. I don't get why people don't forbid to get messages from non-friends if they don't read or answer? I sent some messages hey why did you just leave my game? Why did you just abort my game? Why didn't you accept or decline my challenge when I saw you were online and you made me wait for many time? In other games people are usually answering AND helping strangers but i guess many players there are hostile but I didn't do anything to deserve it. So there is a joke about lichess players:

David made many sins in his life and was paying a first time visit in the place where he should answer for his crimes. The guard of the place was welcoming and made a place-tour to introduce the place:

You see David, there are 3 kind of bad people trapped in the boiling water in 3 great bottles. First bottle it has the LoL players. There is a cerberus guarding them not to escape. Sometimes they try to escape in little groups and the cerberus is there to stop them.

The second bottle has the WoW players and before the bottle, 10 cerberuses are stationed. Beware, David! The WoW players are in this bottle are highly cooperative and they ofthen plan great plans to get out of the bottle with teamwork, once they all teamed up and almost made it out! So i should station 10 cerberuses there to stop them.

The 3rd bottle over there, David! You see that there are no cerberuses guarding the bottle. David wondered why? The guard of the place said: The 3rd bottle has chess players in it, they are usually hostile to everyone for an unknown reason. No real need to station a cerberus there, because if one is about to escape the others will drag him/her back down because they say if they themselves alone can't escape noone should.
POST 2

Loss of motivation

So after I saw the first reaction to my post I saw that the answer of @Irishman964 absolutely verifies what I'm talking about in POST 1.

Someone writes a long text for about 10 minutes of his very free time and shares his point of view and the outcome of it is to get an attack for no reason at all. @Irishman964 is a tipical man who won't say a reason that what's wrong with what I've said but he will attack me publicly. For a joke. For an opinion. No reasons. So I don't know if it's wroth to write this blog at all.

So after I saw Irishman's answer I lost a lot of motivation. I could just blur over to some other forums where it has more wroth to post on. I planned to make 3-4 posts daily but I don't want to repeat myself why I don't do that.

Also happened today that I've read a message from some guy I won't name there but he was outrageous answering to my message because I suspected someone to be arrogant. Well maybe I suspected (person) wrong but still, why can't he just write a message to me with reasons in it why I'm actually wrong instead of writing me a message and call me a (exact quote) "pathetic degenerate" and says me having a "fucking shitty attitude" for suspecting some of his friends being not honest.

So with that attitude you don't wonder why I have a VERY negative opinion about players of the site. If I'll continue this blog or not ... not sure. I won't post in here for a long time or if I post it won't be much. No idea.
POST 3

Answer to a comment & random stuff

@Irishman964 well that's ok if you weren't trying to insult me I'm glad for it so I won't take it personally. But you see if somebody is acting weird you may not say "stay off the stuff mate".

It's my point of view but I guess it's not weird to make a blog on the forum. The idea wasn't original afterall I just copied Sagr0n's blog post about his Blitz games.

I spent some time to balance a variant witch was originally made by (maybe I don't remember that one good I saw this stuff on the forum a long ago.) Atoz and Stubenfisch with a help of Stockfish but I copied it and modified it a little. It's a variant witch Indian players will may like, if it will be worthy I may share the variant FEN on the forum. It's balanced with the help of Stockfish and is more balanced than the original horde.
POST 4

About good-bad, selfishness and ethic philosophy *Highly off-topic*

I hate this world so much and why is this world is so rotten? Because all of the humans are becoming reasonlessly evil and greedy and untrusting and I really don't want to live in this world at all but I have to live on this damned planet. No helpful people anywhere on or offline.

Today I walked in a tiny town and the street was rarely used.....in my very own country was I walking. Another orc-looking untrusting hostile being was in a garden house and the guy was working in the garden seeing that the road is rarely used he got suspicious of what I want to do? What could he think was I about to rob him? Pathletic. So this "entity" I call no human stopped the work and stared directly at me with an ugly face until I left the house and only then he started to work. He was like a dumb watchdog. One's citizen members from 1 state stares suspiciously if somebody walks on the very street. People have no trust and no good only hostility and anger and hate and greed and I guess if I was the creator I would be extremely shamed of myself for what creatures I created. If there is a creator it should be too. Because I see no use of humans. There is only 2 known beings that take more than they recycle to nature and 1 is the virus witch is actually not an organism so if you like there is 1 organism that doesnt recycle at least as much as it consumes that's the human. Its a fact.

There were ever wars on earth since humans appeared and even they took land when they had way more than they can handle. WHY? i don't know and I DON'T want to know that kind of attitude. If someone made a pact for peace that was for their interests and not for good. The only reason there is less war because if there were a real war the Earth's atmosphere would shatter in the blasts and there would be no life conditions on Earth for at least 1 million years and no complex lifeforms for a very long time. If humans didnt have the tech now they would not only go to show people a bad way of doing things through internet but they would simply kill 1 another. Why people gather when they have enough and why noone shares or trusts anybody? Only the creator knows......i guess the creator created man to serve it so it was by interest. The other tales of stuff like humans were created to live and have fun are fake. They were meant to serve. Now they serve individually themselfes and destruction. You can never know when will your best friend betray you because the human specie's most popular saying is "Trust noone!" that's a total shame for a species.

I realise I never really had any friends. The ones I had have betrayed me or would have betrayed me if their interests would be in a way that it would be better for them if they betray me. Nobody has friends only midnless serveants capable of no original personality for themselfes or formal enemies that play the part of a friend beacuse their life will go better if they do so. These formal enemies will strike you in the back and care no about justice. I can't say 1 country in the world where I could go and ask for help and they would do it if their interest wouldn't require so for them having a better life. Some parts of Mongolia was like this a long LONG time ago. Also animals would do the same destruction to the planet if their skills would allow so. Biological lifeforms are totally evil. In a perfect would I would delete all of the biological life forms. A cat pretends to love it's owner because he/she gives it food.

I had a rabbit once. I gave it good food and water but after some time I gave it only dried food because it was not the season to purchase suitable vegetables. When I wanted to touch it it bite me and stratched me with it's nails. Why dogs are always show their "pretty" sides when they are ask for food or some time for walk? Why don't they come to people for no reason or no good for them but for the good of their owners? They pretend to be nice for their own goods. Animals are also selfish. It's the way they've evolved and I guess it's pathletic. I would rather have a robot child than have a child of my own because if would still love me more without interests attached to the love than my own child. If I do bad to my child like I don't buy him/her the best cellphone he/she will hate me. Even if it wouldn't be my fault for not having enough money. A silicon hearted entity serves and likes it's owner, and helps it's owners without interests. If you have a chair it will still do good to you by letting for you to sit in it even if you sit in the chair it won't be better for the chair. If chairs had counsciousness I would say chairs are capable of bigger love than any biological lifefoms on Earth. Chairs are not selfish.

It seems I decided I may copy my blog to a blog website I will create because it would be nice for me to have a blog where I can write my things.
one day 3 monkeys jumped on a plane, but the Frankenstein felt bad so the doughnut went home.
POST 5

Random stuff

Vish will you stop the trashtalk? After reading this I reconsider reading anything on the forum basically. If it's a kinda hidden meaning than okay. But i couldnt solve it...

This week or last week i dont even know already the very best person and the ONLY person I've followed recently has got his account closed....he was active on forum and wrote sensitive stuff and I loved to read it and the topics of his won't be found now so I'm sure he got banned by some moderator for another ridicolous reason.

ProgramFox forbids anyone from writing him messages thats not his friends. Back then he answered to messages by anyone....now he does not. It also happened in the last few weeks. He helped me a lot before...why he decided to stop taking messages I wonder.

I was wondering how ridicolous C based lifeforms are. Most of the complex creatures have special needs. If they don't get enough of the 99 different minerals in the good % they die. Of the temperature rises from 10 to 60 they die. They run fast they get tired. If I put it like this: there is life on Earth for about i dont even know like 2.000.000.000.000.000 years. Give or take 3 0-s I really dont have a clue. And the product of this very long time's evolution is what? Fish in the sea witch dies in a mass if it's environment warms up by a few degrees. A product of so long time and selection and still a weakling dumb pathletic creature. I don't respect fish. They are not useful. There are also worms witch basically cant do anything. Some mammals. They run a few 100 meters and they get tired. A human can't lift a 100 kgs.

And there are robots who can work in 300 celsius, don't need to rest when working, don't get weak, a modern tiny robot arm can lift a huge mass. Product of some years of evolution. So big difference....people say they arent really living dont compare them to living creatures. Whats the difference, robots don't know about themselfes. Fish doesn't either so there is no much difference from what is living and what is just working. If the living is only who knows about themselfes then animals are not really living.

It would so easy to keep a robot dog. They dont need time for various things nor tiny clothes when you take them out for a walk in the cold. They could work for a long time and in cold or in warm.. They wouldn't get sick if they eat a piece of choclate like dogs and consume only energy not food. Dogs don't eat food that's rotten or too salty or whatever. They have so high needs but they are a product of a long time's evolution.

I find this ridicolous. I would probably buy a robot dog if there were a realistic one. I respect rocks because they are strong. They don't get destroyed if the atmosphere shatters or if they live underwater or in the space. Rocks are "beings" that were meant to survive in the world. There are some tough animals out there but they are not as solid as rocks.
Honestly I think some of the views you have expressed are alarming, not only for yourself (you clearly are having issues) and humanity in general. Here's some highlights:

"I really don't want to live in this world at all but I have to live on this damned planet."

You need help. I've been through crippling misanthropy, and it only fueled my depression. You have to channel that hatred for what is wrong in the world (war, famine, injustice, etc) and actively fight it. You know how the world got to this point and perhaps isn't worse? Humans shaped it. But if you resign yourself to misery, misery is all you'll ever get.

"the guy was working in the garden seeing that the road is rarely used he got suspicious of what I want to do? What could he think was I about to rob him? Pathetic."

Yeah, you know, there are people with bad intentions in this planet. If you live/work in a remote place and suddenly someone you never saw before is there, you can bet you'll be weary of what they want. Did you stop to think that maybe you were acting suspicious yourself? Or maybe the guy has been robbed/attacked before in a similar situation?

Peace and love is fine and dandy, but you have to know when to put your defenses up, just in case. Otherwise bad people would just take advantage of everyone.

"One's citizen members from 1 state"

1. They don't know if you're a citizen
2. Who cares if you are? I'm more likely to be attacked by a fellow citizen than an immigrant

"I see no use of humans"

What does this even mean? No "use"? What use could there possibly be? Humans, like every other living organism, survive in many different ways. Beyond just surviving, they also socialize, explore, get to know each other and the universe around them, create art... Whether you ascribe any value or "use" to that is irrelevant, because that's beyond the point. What kind of "use" could there possibly be other than the one you set for yourself?

Are you desperate for a divine being to tell you what the meaning of life is? I'll spare you the search: it's Mu.

"there is 1 organism that doesnt recycle at least as much as it consumes that's the human. Its a fact."

What kind of framing is this? "Recycle"? Well yeah, of course no one else recycles, it's a very human activity. As for polluting, both cattle and vegetation can contribute to polluting the environment, and they sure as hell don't "recycle" anything. Some invasive species can be devastating to wildlife and ecosystem balance. Humans are only a part of a system which does not have a constant equilibrium.

"If someone made a pact for peace that was for their interests and not for good."

Dude, come on. Unless you're being philosophically pedantic (egoism), you can't truly believe this. You think people avoiding war with each other is just because they have something to gain OTHER than not being devastated? What are you even saying?

"The only reason there is less war because if there were a real war the Earth's atmosphere would shatter in the blasts and there would be no life conditions on Earth for at least 1 million years and no complex lifeforms for a very long time."

Completely off the rails, have no idea what you are talking about. "Real" war? So the war my family fled from, and which took my uncle's life, wasn't real? The war against those who were committing large-scale genocide wasn't real?

You also seem to be overestimating how much damage we can actually cause the planet. We can certainly wipe ourselves out, but there will be lots of complex life-forms to evolve in our place.

"If humans didnt have the tech now they would not only go to show people a bad way of doing things through internet but they would simply kill 1 another."

Again, what does this even mean? With all the good things happening BECAUSE of the internet, including the website you're posting this to, you're saying we would only use it to "teach bad things"? If we didn't have "the tech" we would just kill each other? For no reason? lol

"Why people gather when they have enough and why noone shares or trusts anybody?"

Not only is that not true, because we share and trust A LOT, but you seem completely oblivious to all the structural issues plaguing society that encourages that type of behaviour. Have you stopped to think WHY people do that? Is it because we are encouraged by the prevailing order (which is not immutable or inexorable) to act that way to preserve our own interests, rather than be squashed in the competition for resources, some of which are actually abundant?

Saying it's all the fault of "human nature" is just lazy misanthropy. If it were so it remains to be explained why YOU are aware of these issues, but not more people. If more people think the same, your human nature theory falls apart.

"The other tales of stuff like humans were created to live and have fun are fake. They were meant to serve."

Lol dude... You're assuming humans were _created_ and then out of the blue justifying that they were meant to serve. To serve... whom? Each other? The planet? Ourselves? And you say this based on what, your need to find an excuse for your misanthropy?

"Now they serve individually themselfes and destruction. You can never know when will your best friend betray you because the human specie's most popular saying is "Trust noone!" that's a total shame for a species."

Completely out of touch with reality. Humans have lived most of our thousands of years of history without endangering the Earth all the while building, learning, etc. In fact for most of our existence we lived collectively, communally and trusting each other. The opposite of what you're presenting it as.

"Trust no one" is an X-Files slogan, not much more. Those who truly trust no one end up becoming paranoid schizophrenics who can't tell reality from their own fantasies. Almost no human lives alone and without trusting others, not even you.

"Nobody has friends only midnless serveants capable of no original personality for themselfes or formal enemies that play the part of a friend beacuse their life will go better if they do so."

That's bullshit. I've lost most/all of my friends but I don't go those lengths to rationalize it. You need to accept that maybe it's your fault, maybe it's theirs, but friendship and human connection are one of the most important aspects of our lives. Maybe you should just accept that you had shitty friends. It happens, you know? If you stop trying to create connections, then you're surely not going to make them.

"I can't say 1 country in the world where I could go and ask for help and they would do it if their interest wouldn't require so for them having a better life."

WAKE UP! There's plenty of people fleeing wars/disasters and being welcomed in random countries with no connection to their original one. People who have nothing to gain by helping them, other than following their principles. Your whining is so out of touch with what's really out there that it becomes infuriating!

"Biological lifeforms are totally evil. In a perfect would I would delete all of the biological life forms. A cat pretends to love it's owner because he/she gives it food."

This is just stupid. Biological lifeforms are evil? Like... all of life? Because there's a myriad of interactions they can have with each other and the natural world? lol...

And saying a cat only loves the owner due to the food is, again, plain stupid. Lots of cats don't need their owners to eat at all. You picked the worst example possible, but you totally missed the irony.

"Animals are also selfish. It's the way they've evolved and I guess it's pathletic."

Sorry to break it to you, but your opinion is pathetic. Shake yourself off that mental and spiritual numbness, this can't be good for anyone's health.

You're pathetic. You know why? Because you're only sharing your feelings with us for your own good, not ours. You weren't thinking about ME when YOU decided to have feelings, opinions and needs. How dare you????? How dare you have the privilege of subjective experience, agency and independence? Why can't you be a slave to do my bidding????

^ That's how silly you sound ranting about dogs.

"I would rather have a robot child than have a child of my own because if would still love me more without interests attached to the love than my own child."

You're descending further into NONSENSE territory. You're seriously arguing that a machine which is basically a very complex clockwork is even capable of "love". What the fuck do you think love is? Obedience? Is that what you are craving so much, a fucking slave to your every desire? Someone who will not criticize you regardless of what you do or how you treat them?

"If I do bad to my child like I don't buy him/her the best cellphone he/she will hate me. Even if it wouldn't be my fault for not having enough money."

Except, you know... that's not necessarily the case. And if it is, it's probably because the child doesn't know better... are you expecting them to come to the world all-knowing about how society works?

"A silicon hearted entity serves and likes it's owner, and helps it's owners without interests."

No... it blindly follows orders and computations as it was programmed to. If someone changes its orders, the silicon entity will turn on you. Do you really have no understanding of what a computer is?

"If chairs had counsciousness I would say chairs are capable of bigger love than any biological lifefoms on Earth. Chairs are not selfish."

Oh wow, I guess having big love is letting you sit on top of me without complaining, even though you're hurting my back. Why? Just because. GENIUS. Love is apparently not having opinions about anything, or even the capability to think.

"And the product of this very long time's evolution is what? Fish in the sea witch dies in a mass if it's environment warms up by a few degrees. A product of so long time and selection and still a weakling dumb pathletic creature."

I don't even know what to say. I guess we need to be Superman to live up to your standards of evolution.

" I don't respect fish. They are not useful. There are also worms witch basically cant do anything."

You're only showing your ignorance regarding the interconnectedness of life. Fish are useful for a lot of things, including feeding humans and other more "useful" animals in this planet. They are a part of the ecosystem and without them the balance is broken. You say they're not useful, but reality says otherwise. Same goes for worms.

"Some mammals. They run a few 100 meters and they get tired. A human can't lift a 100 kgs."

SO WHAT? A gorilla can't breathe in space and a dolphin can't shoot lasers out of their eyes. WHO CARES?

"And there are robots who can work in 300 celsius, don't need to rest when working, don't get weak,"

And here you show how oblivious you are about your own ideas. You are contrasting all the supposed failings of biological beings with robots, but fail to see just HOW LIMITED a robot is.

Can a robot work underwater? Can a robot climb up a mountain, then climb down, run for miles, swim across a river, then throw a javelin, etc etc? Can a robot withstand an Electro-Magnetic Pulse? NO! Because robots are only good at what they were DESIGNED for. They are SPECIFICALLY good at what we created them for, and are a nullity in everything else. The same robot which makes your cars would have NOTHING TO SAY about this conversation. It would be useless in a life and death situation. It wouldn't sacrifice itself to save you. It is basically useless outside of the very specific task it was created for.

You also conveniently ignore the maintenance of a robot as if it's something irrelevant, lol

"Product of some years of evolution"

Evolution... of human ingenuity and engineering. DUH!

"Whats the difference, robots don't know about themselfes. Fish doesn't either so there is no much difference from what is living and what is just working. If the living is only who knows about themselfes then animals are not really living."

Oh my goodness... What are you saying!? You're confusing sentience and self-awareness with being LIVING, NOT DEAD, EXISTING, HAVING LIFE. Are you seriously telling me a dog who can't recognize itself in a mirror is "not alive" the same way a rock is? Am I to believe that humans with mental problems who can't recognize or know of themselves are not alive? When people experience ego death due to psychedelic drugs, did they temporarily slip into non-life?

"It would so easy to keep a robot dog. They dont need time for various things nor tiny clothes when you take them out for a walk in the cold."

Uh... have you ever seen a real dog? Am I to believe you live somewhere where everyone clothes their dogs? This can't be real... they have FUR!

"They could work for a long time and in cold or in warm."

Ah of course, you just want to exploit them. What use is a creature if it won't WORK for you, right?

" They wouldn't get sick if they eat a piece of choclate like dogs and consume only energy not food"

Yeah, humans are also really maintenance-heavy with their whole "I can't consume cyanide!" bullshit.

Also... FOOD IS ENERGY! Did you not study this at school?

"Dogs don't eat food that's rotten or too salty or whatever."

Yeah, and robots don't eat rocks because, you know... the point of eating is to fulfill your energy needs. Self-preservation and whatnot.

"I find this ridicolous. I would probably buy a robot dog if there were a realistic one."

LOL, this cracked me up, really. So you're ranting about real dogs, and then say you'd buy a robot one IF THEY WERE REALISTIC. Are you serious? So basically if it works like a biological (realistic) dog you'd want one? You don't see the irony in all of this?

"I respect rocks because they are strong. They don't get destroyed if the atmosphere shatters or if they live underwater or in the space."

You really need to study things before you begin making a model of the outside world. Rocks DO GET DESTROYED for various reasons. Some of them can barely withstand any pressure. Others will pretty much explode if in contact with water, etc etc. YOUR STATEMENT DOES NOT MATCH REALITY AT ALL

Please have a look at this website: http://www.eoht.info/page/Rock+vs+human

-><-

To recap, you've shown some very worrying trends in your posts. You seem to be out of touch with reality and with the rest of human society. It seems to me that you're going through a tough time, not having friend and feeling alienated, and you're taking it out on everything and everyone without regard to philosophical rigor.

You're not even trying to understand WHY things are like this, you just rationalize some answer and go with it. Some of what you said could be easily disproved if you took the time to research it. Your train of thought, however, is pretty much self-fulfilling or self-justifying. It finds excuses for you NOT to even bother with other viewpoints because everyone lies, wants to backstab you, is selfishly trying to fuck you over, etc...

This is a dangerous path you're on. This is how people begin to justify atrocities: people are "meant to serve", everyone wants to harm me so I might as well harm them first, no one is really worth anything so their life is as meaningless as a rock, using evolution (wrongly!) to say a creature is "weak and useless", etc.

Most people will read your texts and will brush it off because you're just saying things that make no sense. I'm sure you think we're being unfair to you, but this is the honest truth, and it's why the first commenter mentioned "staying off the drugs", even if jokingly. You are way off what is considered a healthy and acceptable mindset to live with. You're saying robots will love you more than your own children, FFS!

I'm sure you're going through a lot and you probably had some severe issues in your childhood, whether it was growing up an orphan, being abused and/or growing up in a dysfunctional home, but you don't have to sink into that DARK HOLE where so many have died before.

I am deeply ashamed of Humankind and all the harm we cause each other and the Universe... but I also nurture a profound Love for all living things, even the most heinous and perverted! If I ever have to kill someone despicable, even if I deem it absolutely necessary and justified, it will surely crush my heart a little to have to do so. Why? Because we are the Universe experiencing itself, and harming others is like stabbing though the heart of God... stabbing ourselves!

And don't think this is religious or even spiritual. It's a very materialistic and naturalistic approach to life and death, one that accepts the meaninglessness but ALSO the interconnectedness of life and all of our subjective experiences. That isn't just a matter of ecosystems and predator/prey cycles, it's also how we shape society with our words and actions, how our own personas are built from extensive personal experiences which includes other people's subjective values.

You mention the shortcomings of evolution and biological life as if it's a bad thing, as if it was expected to be much better: QUITE THE CONTRARY! Biodiversity is a fucking AMAZING thing. It blows my mind all of the different kinds of creatures which have evolved and survived, even those inside our own bodies! How can you possibly bring up some bullshit standard like "lift 100 kg" to dismiss all of Nature's wonders?

As for people, we are a product of our times. If your kid is salty because they don't have a new cell phone, or because you won't buy them another yacht... that has to do with the culture, society and economy they are growing up in rather than the fact they're human. It might even be your fault for not living up to your own standards and teach them otherwise.

So if you truly want a better world... WORK FOR IT. Instead of just talking the talk, how about you walk it? How about you speak to that gardener and ask them why they were so suspicious and weary of you? How about you connect with your neighbours, or try to trust someone to be your friend, without expecting them to be your slave/sycophant? How about you rise up against those making the world a greedy evil place rather than railing against the Humanity you are supposed to be a part of?

I mean, you're using an Open Source chess website. What better example of human collaboration, goodness and non-greediness do you want? If Thibault didn't decide to make this and just kept ranting on other random websites the world wouldn't have been improved ever so slightly.

So do something about your life and about humanity, rather than arguing against it. You're pinning the blame for everything on others and even on intangible concepts (god, human nature, intelligence) rather than putting your cognitive abilities to work for the collective good. By your standards, you're part of the problem you complain about, but it only depends on you to change that.

I hope this wasn't too long. I apologize for being blunt, but I feel you need a wake up call.

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