Depression chat

@passionate_player said in #6:
> Whatever is the cause of the depression, stop thinking about it.
> If it is related to something you have to do but can't be done, think that it's okay, because every cloud has a silver lining.
> Always remember that every cloud has a silver lining.
1. I live with one of my problems
2.my parents always moves us to places
3. i never get to see my friends that get me
4. school
5. My parents (specifically my dad) are jerks
6. And no one serisouly no one gets me
7. Alot of other things that I don't feel like listing

@achja said in #10:
> In my country there is phone numbers to make anonymous calls to volunteers to talk to about these kind of problems. Maybe in your area that is also available ? And I can imagine there is forums on the Internet to talk with other people.
> And if you have good friends with whom you have a good trust understanding, you should be able to talk with them about these kind of things. (And I must say that now the cold and dark Winter is approaching I take a little bit of anti depressive myself daily, a herbal one, available in some shops)
>
> I've pressed the follow button on your profile if that makes you feel better.
>
> Best of luck !
Thanks

@Dukedog said in #9:
> I've found that being active helps a lot.Exercise is a great way to fight depression.Get out and do something.Sitting around being depressed only leads to more depression.
Ya I have heard that and I have tried it. Doesn't really help but its better than nothing

Yes. Call the counsellors, the quack quack quack brigade. Makes the depression last THAT much longer. Like good bubblegum, or vampires, depending on what synesthetic channel you're riding.

hope u feel better now :( in Russia, guys with this problem can call for special number phone, and tell to he/she all ur problems. i dont know how to be in deprssion. sorry for my bad english :( good luck

@flowergirl10fl said in #11:
> 1. I live with one of my problems
> 2.my parents always moves us to places
> 3. i never get to see my friends that get me
> 4. school
> 5. My parents (specifically my dad) are jerks
> 6. And no one serisouly no one gets me
> 7. Alot of other things that I don't feel like listing

Hello @flowergirl10fl I would like to try to give you some advices. Be aware that as long as you are not just depressed but in a real state of depression, they will not be sufficient to be cured.

First, I think you did the right thing by coming here to talk about it, although lichess is of course not a place where you will receive professional answers.

I believe that, even if you have tried it before, you should continue with the sports or just walking outside. If there is a park, a river or a forest nearby (some nature), it will help you feel better temporarily and not only sit thinking about your depression all day. If possible, make it a daily habit.

Secondly, keep talking about it anywhere you feel you are listened. And no one will probably fully understand you but you can find very empathetic people who will listen to you and believe you for sure. So why not among your friends as well? I think if you have even just one good friend that you trust, this person will believe you and try to help. If you cannot see this friend in person, you have the possibility to do video calls at least.

Then, if there is anything upon which you can act among the causes of your depression, try to focus on that. What you cannot change for now, try to let go and not focus on that (this is a hard part, hence the idea to do some sports, walking or even play chess here when you feel really not well).

Finally, I would encourage you to try to contact some professional even against your parents' opinion if they are not really believing depression is a real and serious issue. There must be some professionals online, perhaps also a psychologist or a psychiatrist at school if you are registered in any school? If you could find the right therapist, it would be very helpful. You might also get antidepressants that might help.

Anyway I wish you the best and do not hesitate to contact me or come back in lichess forums if you do not find help anywhere else.

P.S.: Keep a critical mind on the advices you receive on the internet. If you think they are really not suitable in your case or dangerous (someone prescribing some medicine while they are not doctors), of course do not listen to this even if you are stuck and do not see any good solution to feel better.

@Demonolith said in #16:

> P.S.: Keep a critical mind on the advices you receive on the internet. If you think they are really not suitable in your case or dangerous (someone prescribing some medicine while they are not doctors), of course do not listen to this even if you are stuck and do not see any good solution to feel better.

I see what you mean. I would like to add that this also depends on which country you live in. If in a Western country in Europe a person would suggest you to go to a Ayurveda doctor or try a Chinese medicines doctor or try acupuncture they will likely be suspicious while in India or in China this would not be frowned upon so much. In my opinion regular doctors (Western style) can be fine for diagnosis of the problem but often they do not have much time to talk to you and will give you medicines, which is not always the best solution for anyone.

@achja said in #17:
> I see what you mean. I would like to add that this also depends on which country you live in. If in a Western country in Europe a person would suggest you to go to a Ayurveda doctor or try a Chinese medicines doctor or try acupuncture they will likely be suspicious while in India or in China this would not be frowned upon so much. In my opinion regular doctors (Western style) can be fine for diagnosis of the problem but often they do not have much time to talk to you and will give you medicines, which is not always the best solution for anyone.

Of course you are right. For instance, I am allergic to antidepressants and they are not helping me at all. But they are very useful for some people, so I will not give advices based only on my personal experience.

About Chinese and Indian medicine, as long as it cannot hurt, better keep an open mind in Western countries and try if one thinks that could be a good solution.

My comment is mainly about avoiding anything truly dangerous. Because when you are depressed, you could become desperate and willing to try anything to get better. Then if someone tells you you should drink a lot of alcohol or somehting like that, you might be tempted to listen to such advice if you feel helpless.

Finally, when I say the right therapist, I mean someone who would find enough time to talk and try to find solutions. In my case, I met only one who understood I could not take antidepressants and then tried to find other approaches to help me. And of course it requires a lot of time talking but also some action. This therapist gave me some psychology books to read to help me help myself! And see if some of the books were (or not) describing acurately my own situation to discuss it later with me.

@Demonolith #18
Nice. I appreciate your comment very much. Thanks.

I'd like to add that years ago someone told me that alcohol is a downer. A remark I have always remembered. And I think it is true. Alcohol can bring us in a state where we feel more courageous and maybe temporary feel great. But it comes with its side effects.

@epibrectric said in #14:
> Yes. Call the counsellors, the quack quack quack brigade. Makes the depression last THAT much longer. Like good bubblegum, or vampires, depending on what synesthetic channel you're riding.

LOL that's really funny