What is the objectively best language?

Chinese has a a character that means
:strike first to gain the initiative

(long running favorite letter)

'run', 'set', & 'go' have over 1200 definitions betwixt
apparently this was inevitable

The objectively best language doesn't have to be simple to learn. And determining what language sounds good or the best can be very subjective.

I think all languages have their flaws and something beautiful or intriguing about them.

If you want to speedrun a language and want to learn what's easiest to learn and sounds good, there are FSI estimates https://www.state.gov/foreign-language-training/ for difficulty and you can look up on YouTube to see how it sounds. For most popular languages there is series called Easy Languages where native speakers go around the streets and just talk to people.

KLINGON !

not yap wa' Hol

the one that most people speak, that is, English

toddlers : "gibberish"
when you are angry: "gibberish"
when you are crying: "gibberish"
laughs : "gibberish"
me: "gibberish"
horsey: "gibberish"

Verlan. Because it's probably the only language i speak without mistake