but asking a suspected women player if they are attractive is just weird lol like what does that have to do with chess

When man plays woman at chess...All that focus on mating each other...can have an adverse effect. :]

Hello, good luck, thanks for the game etc. If there's a polite response f.ex. i may propose a takeback when they blunder …

GLHF at the start :)

If they play a wonderful move, i probably say stuff like "wow nice" or "oh crap" followed by a smiley face.
saying Good game or Well played in your own terms make it a lot more genuine, so usually a
"ggs man"
besides, most log off very quickly after they lose or win

The chess community and other online gaming communities have largely merged. I'd say "gg" is the best, most universal thing to say if you're ever going to say anything before/after a match.

I've found takers pretty much every (rare) time I wanted to chat.

During a game: a no-go IMHO
Before and after: rarely, mostly a simple "TY"

You can't post in the forums yet. Play some games!