The best chess opening

The Beauty of the Grob (Gambit)
1. The Grob opening produces excellent king safety
2. The G pawn is the spark that lights a huge attack on the king side
3. The Grob is strange and only grandmasters play it
4. The Grob has a really cool name
5. G4 you! (the grob is g4 you (good for you)
6. The Grob controls the centre (from the sides)
7. You get an amazing grob bishop which takes kings off the board
8. It develops all your pieces especially with the first two moves (develops an incredibly powerful pawn and an amazing bishop)
9. It’s the grob
10. It makes good players resign

i also like the Grob. Always fun to play against it:

It is so bad that White is worse even if Black falls into White‘s „trap“.

A refutation in no time:

SOmeone needs to learn the power of the Hammerschlag

11. "Grob" is Russian for "coffin", which is very symbolic.

@Sarg0n: Wow, I didn't know that! Ever since I found out that black can just play 1...e5, 2...Ne7 and 3...Ng6, targeting the weakened dark squares, I haven't thought about responding to the Grob with anything else.

Hilarious thread. The original posters checklist of points is totally ridiculous right from point 1 where he says the Grob produces excellent king safety. I guess some people feel that if they declare an absurdity to be the truth that no one will question it.

The Grob may be an "offbeat" opening, but many players don't know the correct refutation. Therefore it is best to utilise it as a surprise opening to throw off the opponent, which is what I sometimes do. The OP also claims to have drawn Stockfish Level 8 on Lichess using the Grob, probably due to getting the machine out of its opening book early in the game. He is a very strong player in his own right, and enjoys playing less played openings.

attacking with g2 - g4: the modern way to get the upper hand in chess
read this book early 1. g4 is bad that's why masters not play first g4
1. g4 losing
hippo losing and some flank openings
notice .
play passive and win some material for this ( ıf not bad) not losing sometimes wins
(minimum) get draw but it's hard
Grob gambit is bad because black can sac back and white have weakness played with Queen a lot etc.